Pleasurable Failure

Well this won't be long, all I am doing now is letting my readers know I have failed quiet pleasurably.  I wore a goodnite and wet it in my sleep and today I listened to hypnosis on giving myself a manly cock, that focused on masturbation in the induction, quiet exciting.  I can't get away, I don't want to anymore.  As long as I can remain who I am, I will continue on my journey down this rabbit hole.  Will I get help?  Probably, but not sure when I will make the calls to get that set up.  This will happen if I can no longer function with my current level of activity.  I have a roommate now, so that is helping me not bate all day, I can't, he dosn't know about me, as much as I want him to know about me, it will just scare him off, so this will be kept to times alone in my room, late at night, which is kinda hot too, if you think about it.

I intend to fully do the IQ reduction file when I know for sure it will not have long lasting effects, which I think it wont.  This is the file that is on youtube that makes you a retard for a few hours, I think I will try it before I go to bed tonight and see if I can write a post or not.  I won't bother correcting any of the spelling or grammar so I can see how bad I get, this will make me feel so good to go back and read it again and again so I can masturbate to my own stupidity.  :).  Yeah, this thing has ahold of me, its a huge fetish for me, I have had it for a long time and now it is in me and I can't get it out, I want to feel dumb, to see what its like to not be able to think, to spell, to do much of anything but be aroused and to masturbate, that would be so hot.  My hope is this will not have any long-term effects and that is stays safe.

My next post (hopefully if everything goes to plan) will be after I listen to the IQ reduction file.  I also want to take an IQ test while under to see how far I drop down.  Don't worry folks, this blog will be your front row seats into my descent into this fetish!  Enjoy.